lucy-football

It’s Monday Night……….

I’m sitting on my couch, in the living room, watching Princess Diaries and as my roommate passes me and turns to head downstairs as she gets enthralled in the Redskins/Eagles game, I’m reminded that this will be another year on the books that I’ll be spending my Sunday and Monday nights in solitude.

I was born and raised in South Carolina. Some of you may recognize this state as the home of the Clemson Tigers, the USC Gamecocks or the Furman Paladins. I thought of it as a beautiful state-turned zombie town as my friends, teammates, and almost everyone around me gathered into rooms with beer, chips, and a television set and lost all concept of the reality around them to watch men throw each other to the ground.

Here are the ten things I hate about football season:

1. I have no friends Sunday- Monday

lonely-boy

Sunday-Monday= planning bar meet-ups and banishing me to my room because I don’t share their interest.

2. The infamous beer belly

Drunk Beer belly fat guy with beer bottle and football

It gives every man an excuse to have one and think it’s okay…..smh

3. It’s not basketball season

Is it bball season yetI’d much rather see Lebron James dunk on Jason Terry than (insert incredible football play here).

4. I’m sick of chips and salsa

football-salsa-chips

I’m pretty sure if I hit my friends’ houses and stole all their chip bags, I’d have enough to feed an entire third world country

5. It means the end of summer

Summertime

If it were up to me, we’d do the summer thing year round.

6. Too Much Nudity

hellercartoon

Being Surrounded by multi-painted chests, bellies, and faces is not my idea of a good time.

7. Fantasy Football has become “the other woman”

fantasy_football_breakup_men_women

Because nobody likes to be prioritized after Fantasy anything

8. Non-Football Lovers are considered Non-Girlfriend Material

Bigger diamonds

…….Resulting in my permanent single hood.

9. My social media is flooded with Football

social-media-football-infographic

Unless it’s Kaepernick’s face I’m seeing…..I’m not interested

10. It’s just not that enjoyable for me

Not giving a fuck 1Me not giving a fuck

To all the women out there and people in general who welcome football season with open arms, Kudos to you. But believe it or not there are plenty of us out there counting down the months until it’s over and things can go back to normal. Don’t share my sentiments? Well, maybe once you emerge from your football cave and shake the cobwebs off in February, we can discuss it.

   How do you feel when Football Season rolls around?

-Aliyah

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4 thoughts on “Ten Things I HATE About Football Season

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  1. Renee 4 years ago

    I was going to leave a comment on Sunday, but the game was on lol. Great post

  2. RL 4 years ago

    My sentiments exactly lol

  3. Gwinner 4 years ago

    Why do you hate football season so much? Its not like it takes up your whole week like basketball and baseball does. I love football, its a emotional game that is played with a lot of heart. I don’t support the beer belly, i agree with the chips and salsa but you don’t have to be alone on Sundays. You probably already tried but give it another chance. lol….

  4. Crystal Elliott 3 years ago

    My sentiments exactly! Tried to get into football and I didn’t work. Hate it! Lol