You did it. Somehow in this increasingly difficult age of dating, you not only managed to seriously date someone for some months, but also stuck by it enough to develop the most coveted prize of romantic involvement: a titled relationship.
You’re a winner. Shots on you!
But before you go running off into a romantic bliss worthy enough to spur jealous glares of your adorable couple Instagram shots, you’ve got a few things to consider and work out. One of the biggest? Your closest friends’ role in your new relationship. It’s important, don’t overlook it.
Like any new toy, you’ll be tempted to not share. Who blames you? It was you who spent those two awkward hours thinking of questions for your first date; you who anxiously answered every text and Gchat agonizing over your responses; and it’s you ultimately who gets the butterflies every time something goes right in the relationship. It’s yours–keep it to yourself for a little while. However, be careful to not alienate your friends from getting to genuinely know your significant other in the beginning. Not only is their approval likely important to you, but you want someone who is able to play devil’s advocate for your future lover’s quarrels.
Face it, there is just a great feeling about having your significant other and closest friends getting along. It can help with the balance of deciding who to spend time with. We’ll all go to brunch! It can also help give your partner a different look into how and why you think about stuff. Friends kind of tell on you like that. But, before you go encouraging this budding friendship, remember to keep it organic and that they should NOT become close friends.
There should always be a respectful distance between your significant other and friends. Close enough for a few inside jokes among the group, but far enough that they don’t go grab lunches together. Allowing their friendship to be too close also can impede on the quality alone time you need with your new love and also can lead to sticky situations should you two decide to call it quits.
Balance is key. Remember, you are valued and wanted by both your friends and significant other. Give them both the attention they need and you’ll feel the love all around.