Now that the bizarrely romantic or bitter day of Valentine’s (Singles Awareness) has come and gone, I’m left here pondering the current state of love and relationships. Being an observer, I’ve unintentionally put together a flow chart of my friends relationships in my mind. I mean, I’m usually a first hand witness of their relationships’ highlights and well, turmoils. In this mental snapshot of how my friends operate with their significant others, a single question kept appearing, “Do open relationships work or even make sense?”
Our generation undoubtedly has a high level of self indulgence, need for quick access, and an unnatural level of selfishness. It’s for this reason alone, it’s so hard for us to even like being around each other, let alone devoting ourselves into a serious relationship. It adds to the eternal, forever alone, single status of so many of us. Now, egos and attitudes aside, we are also sexual creatures, like overtly-Rihanna Talk That Talk sexual. Put that beautiful mix together, it’s no wonder it takes nothing for most of us to cancel that monogamy thing and be unfaithful to our “boo thangs.” Not saying that I particularly agree with the idea of an open relationship, but here’s why they just might work:
1. Most open relationships allow for emotional intimacy while allowing for sexual variety.
2. Most open relationships require a higher level of trust and communication. Just because it’s open, doesn’t mean it’s an anything goes situation.
3. For those who find monogamous relationships binding and outdated, open relationships allow for focus on other aspects of the relationship without the constant worry of infidelity,
But wait, what’s mine is yours and what’s yours in mine–period. For those of us with this mindset, don’t neglect that no matter what type of relationship, jealousy usually creeps in. Open relationships generally have the same potential to end disastrous. There’s the scenario where only one person acts on the “freedoms” of the relationship, causing insecurity in the other. There’s
also the chance of feelings developing among the outside sexual/platonic relationships that have been allowed. Perhaps worst of all, what if you start to have better sex with someone other than your boo and you become uninterested in them? uh ooooh.
So what do I want? I think no matter what, we all should define what makes us happy about relationships and what we are/aren’t willing to deal with. Setting certain boundaries, while remaining open to our love interests’ wants and needs is always the way to go. Essentially, only you and your significant other can define just what your relationship is and entails. No matter what, open, closed, halfway cracked open, closed on weekends–your relationship is just that, yours. The only thing that should universally be open in all relationships is respect, communication and understanding.
What’s your opinion on open relationships?