It typically goes without saying that honesty is the best policy. Sadly, some of you didn’t get this memo when you decided to embark on your various dating ventures.
Don’t worry, I’m here to give you a few pointers to aid you in putting a stop to your lying ass misleading ways.
1)If we’re not exclusive, it’s okay to admit that you’re dating other people.
In the early stages of dating, some find it to be perfectly normal to “play the field” and get to know multiple people at the same time. While some people find this to be a distraction and can only focus on one person, others are able to navigate the act of dating more than one person with ease. However, if you are dating someone who happens to ask if they’re the only person that you’re getting to know, there’s absolutely no reason to lie. We live in a small world and social media makes it even smaller. If you honestly believe that someone who is genuinely interested in you hasn’t done their homework in some way, you’re probably mistaken. Letting someone know that you are involved with others gives them them the ability to decide whether or not they want to continue to be involved with you.
2)Stop lying about dumb insignificant things.
Seriously. Just STOP. It’s so unnecessary. You didn’t respond to my text, it’s cool. You weren’t sleeping. Your phone wasn’t dead. Your phone isn’t “acting weird” causing you to not receive my messages. You simply didn’t reply and it’s fine. We’ve all used these excuses (myself included) and it’s not necessary to sugarcoat the fact that we didn’t take the time to respond in a matter of time that someone else deemed to be acceptable. This is just one small example of the little insignificant things that we feel the need to be dishonest about at times and we honestly have no reason to.
3)Let people know if your Ex is still in the picture or has the potential to reenter it.
I would have to say that I am a magnet for people who are still involved with their exes.I always seem to attract someone whose looking for something on the rebound but won’t admit it to themselves that they’re simply not over their previous relationship. That is my burden. In fact, I’ve written an entire article about this topic that you can read by clicking here. For that reason, when first getting to know someone I always ask about the level of involvement their ex still has in their life. This gives me the ability to cut ties before I get too emotionally involved and their ex decides to reemerge. Don’t waste people’s time simply because you haven’t figured out situations from your past that could potentially spill into your present. It’s unfair to include others in your confusion.
4)Be honest with yourself about your intentions.
Too often we attempt to adapt ourselves to fit the needs of others. If someone tells you that they aren’t looking for something serious, don’t force the same ideal upon yourself if you are. Don’t hold out hope for people who are truthful about their intentions if they don’t align with yours because you will only be setting both of you up for failure.
5) If you’re no longer interested SAY IT but more importantly, DON’T MAKE PEOPLE LOOK DUMB,
Stringing people along is something that we often do in order to spare people’s feelings. It is better to be honest about your lack of interest early on because pretending to be interested will only hurt a person more once they find this to be untrue. If you are honest with someone who just won’t take the hint and continues to relentlessly pursue you, change your number, block them on social media and file a restraining order. No but seriously, don’t provide people with false hope when you know deep down that they truly have no chance. There’s nothing like thinking you’re on the same page as someone only to find out that you’re in a completely different book. Don’t allow people to make a fool themselves if you know for a fact that you don’t feel the same way that they do. At the same time, people are responsible for their own actions and how they conduct themselves but don’t play people by giving them mixed signals while having completely different intentions. Why give someone the impression that things are something that they’re not?
The bottom line is don’t do things to people that you wouldn’t want done to you. There’s a good chance that we’ve all be in a position where we feel as though someone is taking us for granted but never stop to think about the times that we’ve done it to others. I promise you that it won’t kill us to be considerate of the feelings of other people for a change.
-Jordan
